Carolyn Chute, novelist.

Not a good deal.

If your image of a novelist is one of wealth and worldly goods, let me put you in the picture. 5% of writers take 95% of all income from books - not a fair deal for the rest of us. Most of us write because that’s what we are – writers.

Carolyn Chute's old typewriter.

The novelist Carolyn Chute apparently doesn't even have a phone, fax or computer. She writes on a huge electric typewriter that was probably high-tech in 1970. Carolyn and her husband, Michael, live in a small compound at the end of a rutted road in a rustic Maine village near the New Hampshire border, US.

Carolyn Chute, 61, a sardonic, straight talking woman, works in their home. The building is heated by wood stove, and has no hot water.

Wow! Carolyn I don’t know how you survive or why you keep going …. But I don’t suppose you know why I live in Spain either.

Good luck to you and yours. I hope your book sells well. May your future be bright.

• Next post on Tell Me a Story - Michael Crichton.
• My other blog - Bedlam.

End of - Carolyn Chute, novelist..

Author, Michael Crichton, dies.

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Best Selling Author.

The celebrated best-selling writer, Michael Crichton, author of such novels as "The Andromeda Strain", and of course "Jurassic Park," was also behind the popular TV drama "ER". He died suddenly, at the age of 66.

Michael Crichton died without warning in Los Angeles on Tuesday, November 4, 2008, after a battle against cancer, according to his family.

Millions of people.

Michael will be sadly missed. A giant of the writing world, I think everyone in the western world will have heard of “Jurassic Park”. The writing of Michael Crichton has thrilled millions of people.

Michael Crichton, I salute you.

• Next post on Tell Me a Story - Submitting for publication.

End of post, Author, Michael Crichton, dies.

How do I submit my friend's book for publishing

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Submit for publication.

Hello Mister Barnett. My friend is fourteen and is writing a book. He’s written sixty pages so far, so is doing quite well. When he’s finished I’m going to be his agent and will want to send it to be edited then submit it for publishing. What I want to know is, how do I go about this? I don't want to let him down.

Not Qualified.

• Hi Brent. Mm…. I'm afraid you're not going to like what I'm going to say.
• 
  
• You realise an agent has to be au fait with all aspects of publishing it isn't just a matter of 'submit a book'. An agent has to be capable of sifting through legal papers, of forcing the hand of the publishing house, of making the most of royalties and advances, and of acting in the author's best interests in all aspects of publishing. I'm afraid you simply aren't experienced or sufficiently qualified to act on his behalf.
  
  I must also point out that a full book will call for somewhere in the range of 85,000 to 100,000 words, not a meagre sixty pages. There is a long way for him to go yet.
  
  For the sake of your friend, click on my previous post How Do I get Published. He'll need to make sure of his work and this MIGHT just help him on his way.
• 
  
• May I wish him all the best with his work. But PLEASE don't try to act on his behalf. If he has talent, he'll need professional help to guide him on his way.
• 
  
• Next post on Tell Me A Story - Brecon Farm.

A Year on a Brecon Farm

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You're as old as you feel.

Don’t ever let age put you off doing what you want.

At the age of 69, a début writer has published a book about life in the early 1950s after his grandchildren persuaded him to tell his story.

Haydn Llewellyn Davies, originally from Dukestown, Tredegar, decided to write about his recollections after years of retelling the stories to his 13 grandchildren.

Always asking questions

Mr Davies spent the past five years compiling his stories into a book, ‘A Year on a Brecon Farm’, which he has published himself. Mr Davies said: “It only came about because I put things down for the grandchildren. They are always asking me questions about my youth.”

The resulting book is a collection of Mr Davies’s memories of life on the farm

Well done, Haydn. Let there be more. I wish you every success.

• Next post on 'Tell Me a Story' - Solomon.
• Bedlam.
  
• End of - 'A Year on a Brecon Farm'
• 
  

John Howard Reid and Solomon

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Manoeuvres the bible.

In his newly released book, "Prophet, Priest and King", John Howard Reid tries to offer a balanced picture of the legendary king of Ancient Israel.

He manoeuvres the avenue between the opposing points of view of the Old Testament. In the Bible, Solomon was portrayed as both wise and irrational, esteemed and reviled, God-fearing and Godless.

Tyrant.

Investigating the Bible's allegations, John Howard Reid pursues a middle course, concluding that even excluding the fact the king supplemented his riches by methodically selling his own people into slavery, Solomon was a typical tyrant of his times.

What we have to remember though, is that in essence this is a work of fiction - a novel. Maybe he’s hoping for the Dan Brown effect?

I wish him well.

• Next post on 'Tell Me a Story' - Alastair Campbell.
• Bedlam.
  
• End of - 'John Howard Reid and Solomon'.
• 
  

Alastair Campbell takes a verbal thrashing

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Verbal thrashing.

Why is it the good and the great think once they’ve made it elsewhere, they can write???

Alastair Campbell's recent venture into fiction – a book called All in the Mind - took a verbal thrashing in the Sunday Times.

The reviewer, Peter Kemp, vented his feelings about Tony Blair's former spin-doctor and his book with, "Anyone for whom the name Alastair Campbell conjures up the image of a glowering bully, professionally adept at manipulating words to suit his purposes, will be confounded by it."

He went on to say, "The personality emanating from his debut novel is that of a swimmy-eyed sentimentalist whose verbal and inventive powers are remarkably meagre."

Superhuman patience.

And that was probably the most pleasant thing the journalist had to say. He continued slating Alastair Campbell with things like, "Slackly put-together sentences," and “Any reader persevering to this point,{the end} will have displayed superhuman patience."

The only problem is, verbal thrashing or not, Alastair Campbell will STILL outsell struggling authors who can out write him a hundred-fold.

The fact that his name has celebrity status will be more than enough to send him into the best selling list – Shit!

• Next post on 'Tell Me a Story' - Essential points of dialogue.
• Bedlam.
  
  End of - 'Alastair Campbell takes a verbal thrashing'.
• 
  

Ten essential points of dialogue in a novel

Tell Me a Story - writing tips

Dialogue is essential to your novel. Dialogue keeps a story dynamic, it can help dentify characters, it is a way of 'showing' instead of 'telling', and it shifts the tale forward.... Without good dialogue your story will die.

Okay, so I know everyone likes lists. To summarize my previous articles on dialogue I've made a list. Hope it helps a little.


Essential points.

1. It could be that up to fifty percent of your novel is made of dialogue – half your book, so make it good, make it realistic.
2. Characters should NOT indulge in chitchat. Every bit of dialogue should move the story onward. If it doesn't contribute in some way, scrub it out.
3. Dialogue should NOT be true to life – people speak in garbled ways - it should just read as if it’s true to life.
4. An easy way to check whether your dialogue is okay, is to record it. When you play it back, you’ll hear the shaky bits.
5. Every central character should have their own unique ‘voice’ that the reader begins to recognize - their own overused words - but not TOO overused. Be discrete, don't make them sound like morons by too much repetition.
6. The better you know your characters, the better the dialogue will be.
7. To a certain extent, you can impart age and character with dialogue without having to explain things to the readers. Young people speak in a different way to older people.... but beware of using the latest 'in' words. Your novel might soon become outdated.
8. Quality dialogue helps readers to become immersed in the novel.
9. Keep your dialogue to short bursts. If a piece of dialogue entails more than one paragraph, it turns into verbal diarrhoea.
10. Stay away from substitute words for ‘said’. Words like ‘affirmed’ ‘articulated’ and 'vowed', highlight themselves rather than how it's spoken. ‘Said’ is a small word that disappears and allows readers to concentrate on the story.

Make the most of your dialogue. Don't waste the opportunity to enhance your story and you won't go far wrong.

• Next post on 'Tell Me a Story', Bookworld.

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Looking for your next read? Try:

SHORT MOMENTS - a collection of short stories that will jerk tears
PAST SINS - a contemporary women's novel

Bookworld and 'Without Reproach'

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Bookworld.
.

I was dead chuffed at a Halloween paty last night, when someone came up to me and started talking about my novel, and told me they'd seen it in the front window display of one of the BookWorld stores.

I was quite amazed.

.

For me, it's like making front page news!!



Bookworld is one of the biggest bookstores around here, so for me it matters.
Thank you Mr(s). Bookworld. Long may you reign.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Olsen twins.
• Bedlam.
• 
  

Olsen Twins, Book Signing Protest

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Olsen Twins

Not only is the ability to string together intelligible words a prerequisite for churning out books, not only must you NEVER offend the Muslim brotherhood with your storyline, but what you wear is important too, so it seems.

Where will it end?

A book signing for fans of the Olsen twins, actresses Mary-Kate and Ashley, took an unattractive twist when irate campaigners assailed the event.

Protest

The two girls were staggered to find animal rights activists in uproar outside the store where they were signing books. The protests were part of a movement launched by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, against the stars for their fashion choices.

An angry PETA spokesperson said, "People who still wear fur haven't woken up to the fact that a big, dead animal on your back makes you look like a troll.”

Now I’m not getting stuck into the debate one way or another – but I wonder if the same spokesperson wears leather shoes? For some reason people seem to ignore foot ware - or don’t dead animals on your feet count?

Will there be a protest at my next book signing because I wear a leather belt and have woollen socks? Okay, so the sheep didn't die to give me wool, but leather....

1. Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Danielle Steel.

Danielle Steel and her first blog

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Danielle Steel.

I feel extremely privileged.

I've had the extraordinarily good fortune to make a comment, on the very first blog post by the celebrated author Danielle Steel.

It's been accepted and is now showing, but in general, comments are, provided they don't contravine decency. I've respected her forever and it’s unbelievable that I should have discovered her blog when it's so new. I thought at first there'd been no other comments, that I was the FIRST, but it was merely that Danielle hadn't accepted the earlier comments at that point.

Apprehensive.

It's strange to realise that Danielle was as apprehensive about her first blog post as the rest of us. None of us know what to say when we start out. We just feel our way into the blogosphere a bit at a time. It falls into place after a while, thank goodness, or I wouldn’t be doing this now.

At any rate, I hope you all join me in wishing Danielle all the best with her new blog.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Louisa McCormack.

Louisa McCormack, The Catch

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Louisa McCormack .

.
Lousia brings us her brand new story with The Catch. The characters in The Catch are a diverse mix of laid-back islanders and Toronto on speed. In fact, the first pages of The Catch almost need a programmed "breath break."
.
Pages blur as heroine, Minnie, scurries through the frantic free fall of her days at the TV network. When her latest reality TV project goes belly up, she decides to regroup.
.

Minnie is 40, a producer for reality TV. When her latest brainchild is turned down by the network, Minnie abandons her high speed city life for Tuck Harbour, a fishing village on Prince Edward Island. A tiny fishing village in Canada’s smallest province.
.

The heroine traces Louisa McCormack’s own route in her move from Toronto to Prince Edward Island. "But," says McCormack in a noisy Halifax coffee shop, "that’s where it stops."
.

We shall see!
.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Dialogue.

Site authentication

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Site authentication posting.

Undergoing MyBlogLog Verification

Dialogue, make it plain, make it obvious

Tell Me A Story

Caught up in dialogue

High-quality dialogue can help readers identify with characters. If your characters hold what appears to be a natural conversation, readers will be caught up with their story. They will feel they are part of what’s going on.

Dialogue has many uses. It can shed light on complex conditions. It can put us in the picture about the past, explain the present, and give suggestions about the future, but whatever way it’s used, it should always be obvious - make it plain.

Mistake

Your reader must at all times grasp what your protagonists are on about, don't make your dialogue hazy. It’s a mistake to make oblique references to events from dozens of pages earlier. The only time you can get away with that is if the incident was so amazing that the reader is bound to remember.

Unbearable dialogue

Be careful of what you allow your characters to say. The area where people come from, often affects the way they speak. This doesn’t mean you should try to write your dialogue in dialect or regional accent. The occasional use of a local expression can be enchanting, but a whole dialogue in dialect is almost unbearable to read.

Make dialogue plain and make it obvious.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Stolen book.

Tatiana Boncompagni and the stolen book!

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Stolen

Oh oh! Trouble looms.

The wife of heir to Hoover domestic appliances, sued her sister on Monday, accusing her of talking credit for her new novel, "Hedge Fund Wives", and publishing stolen chapters of the book onto the Internet.

Socialite and freelance writer Tatiana Boncompagni wrote the novel and for those not aware, she’s the wife of Max Hoover – wow, talk about power trip.

The book is due to be published by HarperCollins Publishers, in May 2009. It will be a sure fire hit now. It was always assured because of who she is - but now it’ll break the bank.

Publicity stunt

Jeez, these celebs piss me off! Publicity rolls towards them like shit to a blanket.

As far as I'm concerned it's just another stunt, similar to the one recently pulled by Stephenie Meyer when her latest novel was supposedly leaked 'WHOLE' to the internet.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Mary Soliel.

Mary Soliel, debut book

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Congratulations are in order.

.

Another success story for a first timer. I love to see first timers strike lucky. It gives heart to us all.

Mary Soliel

The debut book by Mary Soliel, a non-fiction called, I Can See Clearly Now: How Synchronicity Illuminates Our Lives, has been selected by USA Book News as a Finalist in both Best New Non-Fiction and Best New Age Non-Fiction categories of the National Best Books 2008 Awards.

Well done, Mary Soliel. Long may your success continue.

• 
  
• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Halloween poem.

A Halloween poem

Tell Me a Story - Halloween Poem

I hold up my hand, I'm no poet so writing a Halloween Poem doesn't come naturally....

Unpretentious

I'm a novelist. Modern poetry, like modern art, escapes me. I'm of the old school. Poems, to me, should have rhythm and rhyme. So it should come as no surprise that when called upon to write something resembling poetry, I turn to unpretentious stuff.

Okay, so, we've been invited to a party and we’ve each been asked to bring along a Halloween Poem. So here’s my little ditty. Forgive my lack of chic and style; I’m a simple soul.

A Halloween Poem

The Witch


Cackles and crows, and twelve toed boys,
And smelly old crones with bent up bones.
And toads and mice, and long hair with lice,
All tangled and torn start to SWITCH

With fingers crooked in, scratching mole ridden chin,
And hairy old nose, rheumy eyes squinting close,
She drools spittle and blood, and under black hood
All tangled and torn, wears no STITCH.

Mumbling 'tongues', with a broom she prances the room,
And raises her hand, teeth bared, black and fanged,
With eyes rolling bright, she screams into the night,
All tangled and torn, she’s a BITCH

Fear clutches the earth, ghosts writhe and give birth
To worms horrid and cold, no place even for bold,
The world groans and hangs head, as she raises the dead
All tangled and torn, from the DITCH.

The dead, dance in the night, whilst living take flight
Fleeing magic and seer, and dark Halloween fear.
And though rain spews down black, and lightning bolts crack,
All tangled and torn flies the WITCH

So.... my little Halloween Poem is soon to be aired. I hope it goes down all right. If YOU want to read it out at your party, feel free, but please remember to mention my name.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Future of books.

End of post - A Halloween Poem


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Looking for a good read? Try:


SHORT MOMENTS - A collection of 10 short stories
PAST SINS - A contemporary novel

The future for books

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Should Authors stop writing



Anthony, is there any future for books? I think advances in technology are perhaps making electronic books and audio books slightly popular, but now-a-days teenagers don’t like reading. They enjoy films more. The future of books seems to be on the wane; do you think books have any future at all in the coming years? Should authors just stop writing?

• Hello Colin, an interesting point, but what are you basing it on? Where are the facts to back it up?
• 
  
• Hullabaloo
• 
  
• It seems to me the attractiveness of books has never diminished. Look at the frenzy over Harry Potter, look at the long queues and hullabaloo over the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer - it’s tantamount to adulation, and almost on the scale we saw when the Beatles first hit the scene.
• 
  
• I think reading will never 'die a death'. There’s certainly latitude for media other than books, but the power of the written word remains awesome and I seriously doubt books will ‘die a death’.
• 
  
• When people read, they’re transported by the story. In their mind they construct the most ideal circumstance possible for the adventure. When watching films, they see the director's version of events and it can NEVER be as perfect as the one in their mind.
• 
  
• I think most people will agree that a film is rarely as good as the book. So Colin, my answer is, as far as I'm concerned the future of books remains assured.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Dialogue.
• Bedlam.

End of - The future for books

Dialogue, characters, and stock words

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Stock words in Dialogue

Sometimes it’s a good idea to give your central characters a phrase or a few stock words of dialogue, which are theirs and theirs alone. It can help identify and it sets characters apart. It happens in real life so why not in your story. We all know people who have this habit – in fact, we probably all do it to a greater or less extent - take a listen to your own dialogue sometime.

Let your character(s) repeat the words on odd occasions so the reader gradually identifies them, BUT don’t do it too often, or you could make them sound slightly crazy. If your heroine is bouncy and thinks life is “terrific”, you shouldn’t make it her stock answer to every situation, better to use the term intermittently, so readers increasingly recognize the tendency.

Identifying the speaker by dialogue

Carefully consider the words and phrases before you ‘tag’ a protagonist with them. Make sure it’s in keeping with character and social class. Remember, don’t over-do it, but do bear in mind this really is an uncomplicated way to identify the character.

**** Dialogue ****Dialogue **** Dialogue ****

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Oprah Winfrey.

Oprah Winfrey and Kindle

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Ultimate endorsement for Kindle

For those authors like myself, who have taken a very tentative look at Amazon's Kindle e-reader and dithered over whether or not to go down that route, the push to action may just have been taken.

.
In a posting on her Web site, and on her show, Oprah Winfrey discloses that Kindle is her "favorite new gadget".

Wow! That sort of sets it in concrete, doesn't it. The future will definitely be bright for Kindle. It now has the ultimate endorsement.

I wish she'd do the same for Without Reproach!

• Next post, Dialogue.
• Bedlam.
• .

Dialogue, characters, and the novel

Tell Me a Story - writing advice

Principal element

I’ve said in earlier posts that characters are the principal element of any novel.

Part and parcel of any character development, and of the novel in general, is the manner in which people speak - their dialogue.

• Dialogue can impart an enormous amount of information in a seamless way
• Dialogue offers clues to a character’s personality and social class
• Dialogue offer clues to a characters frame of mind.

As part of characterization creation, dialogue is crucial.

Fifty percent of your novel

• Up to 50% of your novel will probably be dialogue - it needs to be. Dialogue keeps your story dynamic.
• Modern books steer clear of long pieces of narrative, modern readers want things to move - narrative slows things down.
• Modern readers are brought up on a diet of TV and films - loads of dialogue - little narrative. They expect their literature to be the same. Confirm this in popular published books. Study in particularly, those in your genre.
• Acceptance or rejection of your novel can hang on the balance and quality of your dialogue.
• If dialogue is going to compose half the novel, it better be good.
  
  
  
  At it’s best; dialogue advances the story and depicts characters far more plainly than descriptive writing. Let’s face it, plain old narrative can be quite boring. Who wants their character or story to be thought of as boring?

Toss that descriptive narrative aside and concentrate on dialogue. That descriptive narrative might be your pride and joy - it might be full of wonderful flowing passages - but it can also weary the pants off people.

Show don't tell

Instead of saying someone was angry, let that character yell and scream. Show what's happening by the tone of words, the staccato remarks, or conversely the gentle exchanges of love.

Vary the tempo

• Use a verbal exchange of ideas and repartee to infuse buoyancy into a heavy scene
• Use dialogue to separate long passages of descriptive work
• Use speech to vary the tempo of your writing.

Don’t assume though, that you can merely pop up with a smattering of any-old dialogue to perk up a dreary section. Speech should fulfil an objective. If it doesn’t, if it’s only chitchat, scrub it out, find something else for your character to do. Every word in your novel should count, whether it be dialogue or narrative there is no excess baggage allowed.

Every word, every piece of dialogue, every character in your novel should fulfil an exact purpose. There should be no hangers on in this game.

• Next post on 'Tell Me A Story', Writing Scholarship.
• Related post, Stock words.

End of post - Dialogue, characters, and the novel